Saturday, October 11, 2008

Surviving Divorce And Separation


Many people dream about happy and long-lasting married life. However, after first few wonderful years, weeks or even days of married life, you may come across various differences between you and your partner that are beyond repair. The marital relationship starts to get disturbed due to conflicts and bitterness. Sometimes, everything goes beyond the limits of tolerance and you tend to think that you cannot stay together anymore.

Even after counseling by family members, friends and marriage counselors, if you both are determined to get separated, then the official process of separation starts. It may be quite stressful for you and your partner to go through the separation phase. Knowing about surviving divorce and separation can help you to be prepared for possible problems and complications after separation.

Here are some tips for comfortably surviving divorce and separation:

* Surviving divorce and separation is not easy at all. Divorce can give rise to some extreme changes in your personal and family life. Your family life may be very disturbed and it may be quite difficult for you to decide how to maintain your relationships with your parents-in-law.
* If you have children, then there may be a big issue about their guardianship. Your children may be frustrated due to the separation of parents. They may experience loneliness, and feelings of irritation may creep in. You need to convince your children that you both love them equally. In case you wish to remarry, you should take the plunge with the consent of your child.
* The main problem that both partners may face during the separation process and after divorce is financial insecurity. You should prepare yourself for the changes in income as well as expenses and dept handling after the divorce. You’ll need to develop a budget according to your needs. Keep in mind that your expenses should remain within the limits of post-divorce income. You should be able to manage your expenses with present income and for that, you should evaluate your needs.
* Divorce and separation can be very stressful for both the partners. Hence, you should be ready in all ways for surviving divorce and separation. After separation from your partner, you may feel very lonely and frustrated. However, you have to try to come out of this condition. For that, you can ask for help from your friends and family members. Their support will help you overcome the pressure. You can also get help from other relaxation techniques to relieve excess strain.
* Do not look at divorce as your failure, but take it as a new start. You can indulge in activities that are of interest. Do not frequently recall the unpleasant or sour memories of your married life.
* Do not let yourself feel low. Instead, boost your energy levels. You should also help your children get through this transition. Return to your work as early as possible as it can help you to come out of loneliness and frustration. Do not let traces of the past affect your present and try to make new friends.

Keep in mind that divorce is the end of marital relations, not your life. It is like a challenge; accept it with open arms and a broad mindset. A cheerful future is still waiting for you. So, be ready for surviving divorce and separation with great patience and hopes of some new beginnings.

1 comment:

Cory Aidenman said...

Thanks for the post, Surviving divorce and separation is hard to deal with.

But what about surviving divorce with children?